I know I shouldn’t acquire anything else when I’m trying to condense my possessions into a car and later on into a suitcase, but I was very tempted today to buy one of the supremely nifty printed shirts at Picky Girl. The jazz music, the light wood floors, the empty space, and the thick green curtains on the dressing room all added to the sense that I could just be, well, a cooler, happier, better person with one of them. I capitulated at Borders later and bought a cheap paperback copy of Lonesome Dove for I’m not really sure when. Probably the plane, possibly my time in Texas,. But I do expect that to be somewhat consumed by playing with PUPPIES–white, smallish, curly-haired poodle puppies named Boris and Otto. I’m so ready to fall in love.
I have a hard time in bookstores, though. I never know if I should buy a copy of something I’ve read and loved or if it’s better spent on a book I might love. But then I really do hate owning books I hate. I only have a few and I blame certain classes for them (actually, the same class, now that I think about it). I usually end up just sad and confused in bookstores. Especially since now every book I want to read is apparently $15. What happened to cheap paperbacks?
I think I’m only posting tonight because I want to hear myself type (really, I do love this new keyboard). I’ve received my new laptop backpack and am using it tomorrow. It’s so compact and neat. It’s how I imagine myself arriving in France–organized and sophisticated with all the latest technology and not looking like a total tourist. In reality I’ll probably be gross and tired and unable to formulate a sentence. Everyone behind me in line at the train will roll their eyes about the clueless American who doesn’t know what she’s doing and doesn’t really speak French very well. So in that scenario the backpack is really just there to make me feel better.
Am fighting a rising sense of panic at the thought of other people and myself leaving here for good. I sent Emily H a card today. At least I’ll always have Hallmark. Oh wait, no I won’t. I’ll have to buy French cards that no one will understand.