thinking about October or March was like looking into a big black hole where I couldn’t believe I would still be in the U.S. and couldn’t imagine what my life would be like, except that it would still not be France.
At the same time I was so astonished at how sad I was to be leaving Reims (it was so pretty in the summer, like a completely different town) that I figured that I would get attached to pretty much any city I ever live in, including Austin.
It’s not at all the end yet (one more month of spring classes, one very full month of summer classes, and two months of probably hanging out in San Antonio, thanks Mom and Dad), and yet it’s easy to see that this year has been a good one. There was no heartbreak, no loneliness, no boredom, a few good friends made, and lots of friendly acquaintances.
I still can’t imagine staying in the U.S. for the moment. I consider it now and then and it just feels like there’s unfinished business elsewhere. But I think what I’ve learned is that how I’ll feel about all of this in the future is sort of unpredictable.
It doesn’t hurt that Austin is a multicultural, environmentalist, progressive, live music center. But I want somewhere with more history and more population density. At least for now. (Also I’d have to buy a car and get allergy shots if I were to stay in Texas.)